Motherhood

Instead of Pulling Out Our Comparison Charts, Let’s Give Each Other Grace Today

It never even occurred to me that other moms might be struggling too. Grace didn’t cross my mind. A simple word that embodies so much, but one we so easily overlook, forget and brush away like yesterday’s leftovers. During my first year as a mother, I so badly needed it.

I looked at other moms in their mini vans and carpools and thought they had it all together. Our little rancher on 30th Street served as my retreat, and I walked the tired road of motherhood with little companionship or outlet.

Isolation can take your weariness to a new level.

There is something about getting out, throwing on the lipgloss and the shoes and breathing fresh air, even if it’s in the confines of a mall, that gives life.

One day in the middle of September, I received an unexpected knock on our door. Another mom who went to our church stood with her two young children on either side of her, food in hand. She didn’t care that it was after noon and I was still in my PJs. She didn’t care that I looked like a train wreck and the toys weren’t picked up.

I escaped the confines of those brick walls and when I returned, I felt prepared to go another round.

Eventually, I started going to MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers) meetings and Bible studies and I discovered something: All of these moms who I thought of as veterans were struggling too. They experienced the sleepless nights and the toddlers who would only eat noodles. They were human, like me.

When we put away our comparison charts and extend grace, the long road of motherhood becomes more joyful.

It’s then that we realize that the mom with the perfect hair and make-up has her own set of problems, and she needs a listening ear just like we do. We see that by being real and authentic, we let the Light shine through us, instead of putting up a facade of perfection.

So today, if there’s another mom you’ve been avoiding because she seems like she has it all figured out, try starting a conversation with her. It’s amazing how much we learn when extend a simple, “hello.” And then we say something other than, “I’m fine,” or “We’re good.” When we let someone in.

That is when real community starts. That is when grace starts.

And a life without grace is no life at all. Reach out to another mom and extend the very breath of life.

Give grace.

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